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Tossed Salad Friday

~~ Dementia-ville went on the road recently once a visiting nurse looked at the patient and declared, “Whoa, she needs to be in the hospital!” Was she sure, as there’s a transportation issue, it’s below freezing outside, and there are tons of germs in emergency rooms? Oh, yes, the patient had to go, and so, an ambulance was called.

Within seconds of being seen by a physician, the patient was deemed to be experiencing nothing more than a pressure wound (an affliction of the inactive). Wherein the doctor launched into a diatribe about the needless and potentially harmful overreaction of the nurse. Look, doc, that’s between you and her — how do we get the patient back to her home? Oh, gee, you’ll have to wait upwards of two hours for an ambulette…

~~ Two acquaintances were talking with me about their disdain for caring for the elderly at home when one inquires, “Did you do it to preserve [the patient’s] estate and keep the money?” It’s been three days since she asked the question and I still haven’t stopped chuckling.

~~ The smell emanating from Dementia-ville was straight-up bus station bathroom for a few days. Then it veered off into a saucy marshland aroma with just a soupçon of asphalt.

~~ A reader reached out to me saying she has a love/hate relationship with the way I describe the smells. “I laugh and wince at the same time!” she wrote. Yeah, me too (minus the laughing).

~~ Overheard in the ladies room by a blog reader:
"Wow, salads and walks. You're on your way!"
“Well, it’s either that or buy new pants, and the budget doesn't really allow for that."

~~ Overheard: “He eats like a horse. I’ve seen him eat seven plates of sushi!”

Same conversation: “Don’t tell him it’s your treat. If he knows you’re buying him dinner, he won’t eat for four days beforehand.”

~~
I totally forgot to wish readers a Happy Hanukkah in last week’s blog. Inasmuch as I have no kids at home anymore, and I’m so busy in my role as a volunteer soldier in the war against Christmas, I just blanked. I’m sorry. So Happy Hanukah if you observe, and just to be safe, have a Zissen Pesach as well!

~~ Knowing that tRump took a motorcade to cross the street from the White House to the cathedral and then tossed his overcoat to a military officer at a state funeral was just the start of his poor behavior that day. Sadly, wasting taxpayer money and treating an officer like a servant pales next to keeping your hands at your side when the rest of the congregation places one over their heart and later sitting with arms crossed like a petulant toddler. Then again, I’d take privilege and peevishness over criminality and treason every day of the week.

Dasvidaniya. Have a great weekend. 
J!-E!-T!-S! JETS! JETS! JETS!
LET’S GO RANGERS!
GO, NY KNICKS, GO!

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