LitaWrites (real_lawyer) wrote,

Tossed Salad Friday

~~ Dementia-ville update: After pleading and finally threatening, my spouse got the agency to remove the nasty aide from our premises. One of her duties is to acquaint the replacement aide with the patient’s routine, the location of supplies, etc. All the departing person did was scream, “Ask the son!” as she bolted out the door.  Oops, what’s this? She’s coming back in because she forgot to get her time sheet signed and now wants “the son” to sign it! Said son said NO.

~~ I’m not an advocate for replacing humans with robots, but I’ll take Zora over Aide Lucyfer any day of the week.

~~ I had a major meltdown last week. I almost committed homicide and tossed myself a spectacular pity party. My very smart friend “♥♥ ” who I’ve known since she was born*, offered me such spot-on advice I’m certain would help someone else burdened with an illness.

*I think I’m less than a year older than her and… oh, ♥♥, did I just miss your birthday?

Here’s ♥♥’s advice, offered over the course of a few messages:

Having now dealt with [a condition] for more than a decade, I’ve learned that nobody cares except me. I just say I can’t make it and leave it at that. Found it’s easier in many ways.  I’m sorry that you are dealing with an illness like this.  It’s an endurance test.

It’s all very personal and people who don’t deal with anything like this really don’t understand. Sometimes I [have symptoms] people might notice. Like you, I’m sure, one becomes adept at compensating and just getting on with it. That works for me. I don’t always care to share and while I do appreciate the martyr like tones that come with the proverbial suffering in silence, I also know that very few people really know what to say or do in response. They certainly feel something about it all, but struggle to get past the awkward part of how to discuss it or offer help that doesn’t seem like they are condescending (assuming they are genuine in their offer anyway and aren’t just saying what they think they should say). From my perspective, it isn’t their problem. It’s mine. It’s manageable. Onward!

Stuff like this is hard enough without inviting the world to deal with it with you. And as my Mom would say — fuck them! It isn’t about them.

~~ The friends who never followed up to see how I’m feeling? What ♥♥’s mom said.

~~ Overheard: “If he wanted something from us, and it’s evident he did, he shouldn’t have waited until we were saying goodbye. For chrissake, he was in New York for three days.”

~~She: “You cut your hair.”
Me:   “No.”
She:  “You’re not wearing your glasses.”
Me:  “I don’t wear glasses.”
She:   “OK, I give up.”
Me:  “I lost 12 pounds.”
She:  “No, I would have noticed that. But I’ll figure it out!”

She didn’t.

~~ The racists of Mississippi have given the racists in DC more votes to approve judges on the wrong side of civil rights. The great pontificators, Susan Collins and Jeff Flake, have AGAIN failed to walk the walks they so loudly talked. On the other hand, when the shits chips fall, look who’ll be standing there ready to govern.

Dasvidaniya. Have a great weekend. 
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