LitaWrites (real_lawyer) wrote,

Tossed Salad Friday

~~ A new health report pronounced, “Sitting is the new tobacco.” I read a food review that referred to cauliflower as “the new kale.” Shortly thereafter, I saw knitting proclaimed as “the new yoga.” I’d say that stale comparisons are the new half-assed form of writing. New!

~~ Two distinct snipes landed near me in the space of two minutes. At a yoga class, a new arrival asked if she needed to do anything else and the teacher said, “Yeah, you have to fill out a waiver. You know, so asshole lawyers have less people to sue.” Then as I settle onto my mat, the two women laying out their gear nearby are chatting loudly. One says, “Your psychology class sounds so much more exciting than my creative writing class. I could never imagine being anything as boring as a writer.”

~~ The woman seemed nice enough, but 30 seconds or so after I met her, she was telling me how she loves camping because it’s liberating to “go in nature.” 1427775624zz5cb  Just to up the ick factor, she added that she was “jealous” of her dog who can “go anywhere.”

~~ An assistant DA asked me to appear as an expert witness. When I said I’ve retired, she said, “You’re not allowed! No one gets out of the practice of law alive.”

~~ I overheard this charming statement: “Our family just doesn’t do idle well.”

~~ Listening to NPR the other day, I was reminded just how alluring a progressive Constitutional lawyer sounds.


~~ Little advice: no matter how much you want to write a story about an inclusive kayak club in the area, don’t google LGBT paddling.

~~ So the NFL magnanimously gave up its tax-exempt status and will now pay taxes. What good citizens (I can’t say corporate citizens anymore, thanks to SCOTUS)! Did they mention the part about how the public will never see the books again and the concussed and crippled former players won’t have a clue about the dough the NFL rakes in?

~~ Do you know the evolution of the word mesmerized? I just learned it the other day and it’s way cool.

Have a wonderful weekend!
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