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Keep Your Cool, Fool!

In the middle of the closing, the seller started to scream at anyone unfortunate enough to make eye contact with her. She thought her attorney was “incompetent,” the buyers were “pushy,” the bank attorney was “indifferent,” and I was “smirking.”

Then she told the real estate agent that he was “a world-class jackass” before she left the room in a cloud of fury.

We all looked around at each other, not quite believing that we’d all been insulted for no apparent reason. Then all eyes turned to the seller’s daughter, who was slowly trying to slink out of the room in shame.

When she saw that her saunter was being observed, the daughter shrugged and said, “Mom loses her cool sometimes. She probably just needs a glass of water.”

That faucet must have also dispensed Prozac, because the seller returned to the room, red-faced and as quiet as a crowd of 47-percenters hearing they aren’t entitled to things like health care.

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