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March 15th, 2019

Tossed Salad Friday

~~ “I am so done with winter!” I proclaimed after zipping up my boots and my coat. “I hate zippers AND cold weather.”

The woman I was with agreed and said she had a zipper horror story to share. Seems her co-worker couldn’t get the zipper all the way down on her knee-length parka, so she tried to step up, over, and out of it. She was unsuccessful — she tripped and pitched forward into a door frame, breaking both her arm and concussing her cranium.

My instincts are correct. Zippers suck. And they cause great harm.

~~ “See that over there?” she said, pointing at the plate cover on the wall “It’s my emotional emoji.”

“Don’t you mean it’s your emotional outlet?” I wondered.

~~ The fight in the waiting room was amusing, seeing as how I wasn’t involved. She was furious at him for telling her to take the “Pine Aire” exit while he was yelling that he told her to take the “Pinelawn” exit.

She: I got so lost because of your directions.
He:  Clean out your ears once in a while and you won’t get so lost.
She: Seriously, you want to do this here?
He:  H-E-R-E or H-E-A-R, it doesn’t matter. None of this is my fault.
She: Oh, it’s A-L-L your fault.

~~ Overheard: “Nah, you don’t want to watch that yoga teacher on YouTube. She’s Canadian and says please way, way too much.”

~~ Maybe the doctor’s friends think this is funny, but how do his or her patients feel seeing this in the parking lot?

~~ Two women in my immediate vicinity were discussing the pregnant one’s condition. “How many weeks are you?” asked the non-expecting one, and as the expecting one started to answer, another person walked by. “I’m 38 on Monday,” replied the mom-to-be. The passerby stopped, stared for a moment, and said, “Sorry to interrupt — and happy birthday — but you look great! You don’t look much older than 30.” The pregnant woman’s face fell fast and hard. With clenched teeth she seethed, “I’m 25 years old. I’m almost 38 weeks pregnant.”

That passerby might still be tripping over herself to apologize if the yoga class hadn’t started a minute later.

~~ They come for one of us, they come for all* of us. This is why I work every day to remove this malignant administration and the evil it has unleashed.

*Except for Stephen Miller.

~~ On a better, brighter note, today is Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg’s 86th birthday. Please take a moment out of your busy day to send her some healthy vibes and maybe plank for solidarity.

~~ I don’t drink coffee, so Howard Schultz probably has no use for me. And I have no use for him, either, even after his apology. (That comma isn't why.)

~~ If tRump has “all the best people,” why do so very many of them go to jail?

 

Dasvidaniya. Have a great weekend.
LET’S GO RANGERS! sigh
GO away, NY KNICKS, GO!
LET’S GO METS!

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