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Tossed Salad Friday

~~ I overheard some crazy and blush-worthy stuff earlier this week. There was the woman who was talking on the phone to Devin, whom I’m guessing was her son. “Wait, it’s the first day of school tooooo-day? I didn’t hear anywhere that Stony Brook started. Are you sure?” [Pause.] “OK, maybe I should have known, but you didn’t emmmmmphasize it.”

~~ There were two women discussing divorce. Denise was divorced and Michelle was contemplating it (I know their names because they introduced themselves to each other at the end of their conversation). Denise spent three years arguing with her spouse, a firefighter who’s been messed up since 9/11 (“Really, like he expected me to keep waiting for him to get better?”) and warned Michelle that divorce is a tough slog. Michelle protests. “I want to love someone, and my husband just isn’t the one. He loves me and he’s OK, but I want someone who’s neater and smarter and makes a better living.” To which Denise snorts, then exclaims, “Good luck! Those guys aren’t out there but if they are, they are looking for someone 20 years younger than you.”

~~ Michelle apparently is planning to tell her husband this week that she’s leaving him, so she’s having her lashes and nails done beforehand. Denise wonders if she’ll be getting anything fancy, nail-wise, to which Michelle replies, “I’m not going to get those sparkly flowers or anything. What if I pick my nose or masturbate and lose the sparkles up or down there?”

~~Funny, sometimes I want to know more when I eavesdrop. In these cases, I knew way too much already.

~~ This week’s tally of things the aide left empty in place so I’d discover and replace:
1. The water cooler
2.  The paper towel holder
3.  The laundry detergent

~~ Then again, she’s just another unpleasant memory now. The care agency told us late Wednesday the aide was leaving Thursday morning — despite their promise of a switch never occurring on a Thursday or Friday and never before a holiday.

~~ The screams from Dementia-ville were less froglike and much more demonic in the past few days. Picture the ghost in the cheesiest horror movie you’ve ever seen bellowing BWAH-HA-HA-HA-HA over and over. Then the ghost spies another specter threatening its haunted territory, so it shrieks YOU ARE UGLY! HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA! UGGGGGGGGGGGG-LEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!


~~ If you’re keeping score at home, I still don’t drink.

~~ Two women are discussing a book club that one is urging the other to attend. “It’s not like So & So’s club,” she says. “We don’t really discuss the book at all.”

~~ I wish I understood more about what happened with and to Dilma Rousseff, but from what I read, there’s a sexist thread running through her impeachment.

~~ This:


Have a great holiday weekend. Thanks to the people who work while we relax. (Or yearn to relax.)
LET’S GO METS!
J!-E!-T!-S! JETS! JETS! JETS!

Comments

( 2 comments — Leave a comment )
(Anonymous)
Sep. 2nd, 2016 01:59 pm (UTC)
I feel/see/hear everything you write ...
real_lawyer
Sep. 2nd, 2016 02:07 pm (UTC)
Thank you. I hope you're not going through something so sanity-sucking.
( 2 comments — Leave a comment )

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