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Tossed Salad Friday

~~ I’m going to start with a gripe and get it out of the way:  I came thisclose to having an entire weekend away. Thisfrickingclose. The bitter cold, the present-and-predicted snow, a dog’s ear, and a dog’s screech conspired to put the kibosh on those plans. However, now I know it is possible for the first time since 2006, and I am going to achieve this goal in 2014.

~~ What’s with naming winter storms, Weather Channel? I don’t like personalizing Mother Nature’s wrath, but I’m not in charge of you. So knock yourself out and name the storms as you please. Just tell your stand-up forecasters not to block the first letter of Janus!
j ANUS
~~ My husband and I made excuses not to shop all weekend, so we never went to the supermarket. Out of anything fresh, we headed to Trader Joe’s this past Monday while the impending mega-storm became headline news. Since I don’t buy milk, I can’t tell you if that shelf was clear. But I can tell you that there wasn’t a single avocado, one head of kale, or a solitary stalk of Brussels sprouts to be found. What the hell, people? You’re supposed to swoop in and clear the store of milk, bread, chips, and beer in a pre-storm panic, leaving some fresh produce for procrastinators like me.

~~ OK. I think that this is funny:
french kiss

~~ Last year, a very right-leaning woman ranted and raved to me about “lazy people living off the back of taxpayers” like her. I spoke to her again the other day. She’s lost her job and wanted to know if I knew how she could “maximize” her unemployment benefits before she headed down to apply. I put her on hold for a minute so that I might high-five karma before contritely shedding a genuine tear for her plight. I wish the best for everyone, but I do wish people who sneer at those in need would understand that we are all in this together. Good luck has a funny way of arbitrarily running away, and bad luck frequently shows up uninvited.

~~ When will people stop deciding a woman's name is completely dispensable? My name is not and never has been "Mrs. [my spouse]." And while we're at it, if people in a family choose to go by two different last names, then they are the Yes-No and No Family. You can't designate them the No Family without expecting someone to feel left out. It's 2014, not 1950!

~~ I don’t care how you dance around the issue, “thug” is a code word. It's 2014, not 1814!

Enjoy your weekend!
LET’S GO RANGERS!
GO, NY KNICKS, GO!

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