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Food, Glorious Food!

This is also a tale I told here in 2007, but as so many new readers have come aboard since then  ̶ and the story amuses me no end  ̶ I’m sharing it again.

 

Once upon a time, before web maps and GPS were accessible tools of the geographically challenged, the choices available to help me find my way to a new location were to look on a map (incomprehensible) or call my destination and ask for directions.

 

 I'd cringe when a man answered, because 98% of the time he'd tell me to "head sound" or "travel north" and then throw in some helpful tip like the building was on the "southeast corner." (If I understood those things, I’d use a map!) When a woman answered, there was a 99% certainty of being offered guidance via landmarks. 

 

I dialed a phone looking for help one day.  I needed to find a building in a far-off town, and was delighted when a woman answered and offered me assistance.  And what assistance it was! This navigational guide led me off the Long Island Expressway and towards her building with landmark after landmark.

 

Midway through her tips, I spotted a pattern.  Either she worked in an area populated exclusively with fast food restaurants and supermarkets, or this was a woman who loved food!  She led me towards the closing destination with references to Wendys, Burger King, Checkers, Pathmark, Taco Bell, Shop Rite, and not one, but two Dunkin' Donuts, the second of which was directly across from her parking lot. 

 

Photo by taberandrew

 

I arrived at the closing without a hitch, ready to thank my contemporary Sacajawea.  Admittedly, I also wanted to see if her appearance matched the image in my head:  that of an amply padded woman who hungrily burst forth from her office midday to partake of fast food and shop for dinner (I know, this is far from my finest moment).  I entered the offices and there she was, just as I pictured her, eating a bagel and drinking Dunkin' Donuts coffee. 

 

I smiled, thanked her, and after the closing concluded around noon, I said goodbye. She acknowledged my words, but didn’t look up -- she was perusing a take-out menu!

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